To Trump, From a Pittsburgher

the tower 1.5 degrees

Dear Trump,

(You ready for some realness? Okay, good. You don't have a choice.)

Bitch, let me slap your egotistical, narcissistic ass all the way to Mars.

(Though I'm not sure the Martians would want you either.)

I am a Pittsburgher, born and raised baby! I may not be the brightest person out there, but I sure do know that you just gave the world the bird (I'm not talking about Twitter) and you probably mooned Mother Nature, too.

If you say you represent Pittsburgh, then you only represent 20 percent of us because the rest voted for Hillary Clinton. Lucky for Mother Earth, American cities created a local Paris Climate Agreement to help cover for your dumb mistakes.

(To the rest of the world, I sincerely apologize. Most of us didn't ask for this either. Just hang in there. We're trying our best.)

I couldn't just leave my opinions in the dark either, realness needed to be served . (But I mute you on Twitter. Anderson Cooper was right, I have never felt more at peace.)

You, sir, really need to step back and take a break from tweeting, though. You won't have much of your supporters left if you keep giving them heart attacks every two seconds.

Pittsburgh doesn't want you to represent us. Honestly, most of America didn't want you representing them either.

Sincerely,

A Pittsburgher

P.S.) I'll be in France in less than two weeks. Nine whole days in Paris...now that's what I call a bit of irony. :)